New Zealand Fishing
Fishy Stories

Welcome to New Zealand Fishing's "Fishy Stories" page. We hope you'll enjoy the various fishing tales, jokes, recipes and other fishing related materials we've included here. If you have anything on the topic of fishing you'd like to add - a great fly fishing joke, a tale about the "Big One" that got away or how you managed to save your fly box when your partner jumped to his feet to net that rainbow trout that you had to throw back - please use the link at the bottom of this page, we'd be happy to add it (if it fits of course)!

100 pounds of Brown
By Miles Rushmer

More than twenty brown trout, ranging in size between 10 and 20 pounds, in a one kilometre long stretch of roadside ditch, closely flanked by six metre high blackberry and swamped by large willows….

Hardly flyrod country – but when it’s the only legal method on this water there had to be a few funny moments. After all, it was practically a joke attaching yourself to these brutes on the fly – even with fifteen pound tippets and size eight nymphs (just so the steel would hold).
Like when Shauns #12 hook straightened in less than one second flat leaving him lost for words (a rare occurrence).

When, on the strike, his fly rod ended up slipping around a steel post behind him – with fifteen pounds of fast brown threatening to snap it in short order.

Or when six fish, with a combined weight of close to one hundred pounds, all decided to turn tail and hurtle towards us….Gotta admit to being almost scared at that point! After all, the ditch is only four feet wide and a mere two foot deep in most places. I for one was certainly glad I had neoprene waders on at that point – if not purely for their “shin guard” advantages. The bow wave leading them was fairly intimidating.

Yes, yes – of course we tried just putting the landing net in their way – and yes, as we had jokingly suggested, the fish sailed straight into it, and clean through the bottom, blowing out the hoop in the process! He was about 18 lb’s that one.

Never, never ever in my life have I seen anything quite like it – and on public water too. I guess that no-one before us had ever thought to crawl off the roadside, down the tunnel through the blackberries and drop into the drain.

There was only one place that a fly could actually be cast through the length of the one kilometre long beat – the rest was simply dangling a weighted nymph from the rod tip below three inches of line. With the nature of the brownie being that if it lies still it thinks you can’t see it – one could walk right up to the fish and bug it with a nymph in the manner described. Sooner of later it would bite at it! It was definitely more of a bite, as opposed to eating it – and the strike had to be quick or you witnessed first hand how quickly a trout can spit out a fly. Yes, this was definitely slingshot and bow-and-arrow casting country, and gave us both a new insight into the term “all hell breaking loose.

But ohhhh, what was the point – every fish we hooked completely smashed us in less than five seconds – did I mention the one that dived straight under the bank into the tangled mesh of blackberry and carried on in for some metres – got a bit of eel in them those brownies I reckon! Had to laugh when Shaun decided to feel his way down the line to see if he could feel the fish stuck well under the bank and hopefully “land” it – then deciding, upon remembering that it was well over fifteen pounds worth of fish, with huge jaws, and needle sharp teeth, that it wasn’t such a good idea.!! One just had to stand and laugh at the futility of our predicament! We simply could not stop them.

We drew the conclusion after five hookups that the only way we were going to bank one of these monsters was if they made a mistake, and made a mental note to avoid at all costs letting one run between our legs, dragging the rod tip after it!

I tried chasing the next one as it tore off back down the ditch. All that happened was I got very wet, and the brown (a mere 12 pounder) dived into the blackberries when it had had its fun with me, abruptly ending the connection.

We left the ditch in the failing light completely exhausted, highly excited, somewhat shell-shocked, and wondering how flyfishing could ever be the same again! We were also fishless!

Strangely enough it was only two days before I raced back to the skinny brown ditch, heavily veiled under its dense curtain of blackberry and willow trees. I hadn’t slept much those two nights – it was a trout fishers nightmare….confronted with large numbers of massive brown trout, and yet unable to lay a hand on one. There were fish in there that were probably over the 20 pound mark – bigger than many kingfish I’d seen. But how to put one on the bank with the fly rod was as yet beyond me.

I had my friend Nick with me this time – primed to face visions of awe, ruined only by despair….could we bank one this time?

The look of disbelief on his face as we jumped into the ditch said it all…until I pointed out the shape of a massive pectoral fin. Only then did he accept the reality, and enormity of the task ahead.

We had seen some eight double figure browns by the time we got to a particularly overgrown section of the stream. One of them had been well over 15 pounds, with the others a shade over ten….nothing that could have prepared us for what we were about to witness. For in the shallow water in front of us now lay two brown trout bigger than anything either of us had ever imagined possible. They were so big that the water hardly contained them, lying side by side with their broad olive-brown heads swaying lazily in the gentle trickle.

We just sat down…it was all we could manage, each of us well aware of the other’s inability to do anything else. Anyway – what else could we do? Catch them? Not a chance….yet it was the only thing on our minds as we sat and watched, calculating the odds of landing such a beast on our flimsy rods.

It was quite a picture, and we sat for a good many minutes soaking up the scene, catching the memory at least, of these outstanding trophies.

I thought they had seen us as they slowly moved up the shallow stretch of sand, side by side. But then they stopped, perhaps ten metres above us, and turned downstream towards where we sat. Then a strange thing happened. Something I have never witnessed before. They both stuck their heads into the sand, heaving the back half of their long bodies out of the water, and proceeded to headstand their way down the remaining stretch towards us. Tails sticking high in the air, waving simultaneously like two synchronised swimmers. It was quite a sight! Then one of them broke and tore off up the pool at huge speed before turning and flying back down, smack into the middle of the other fish. The noise was loud, a sickening blow of flesh meeting flesh, clearly audible from where we sat. It made us both catch our breath as they fell in side by side and repeated the whole ritual again.

What a treat, sitting hidden watching those two giants perform this bizarre ritual over and over – even today I couldn’t say whether it was a love or hate situation between them. I really can’t explain it. But I did know we had to have a go – and in one cast they were gone.
Later in the day we finally managed to bank a fish from that drain. It was hardly a battle either. For when I struck the fish it barrelled on the surface briefly before launching itself up onto a shallow bank. I threw my rod down and dived on him, heaving him up onto the safety of the hard. The fight took perhaps seven seconds in all, and yet it had been such a battle getting it.

We decided to keep it, for it was a trophy in more than a few ways, and it weighed close to fifteen pounds. Nick has since managed to haul one out that went over twelve pounds, and it too simply made the mistake of running the wrong way.

We haven’t seen those two giants again either. They dwarfed all the other double figure browns that we saw and somehow belittled our feat of landing one.with their own antics If you’re ever lucky enough to run into them, just sit and watch and enjoy.

The author, Miles Rushmer, operates M.R.G., Miles Rushmer Guiding located in the Bay of Plenty area on the East Coast of New Zealand's North Island. He specialises in fresh water and salt water fly fishing. You can reach Miles by e-mail: milesrushmer@xtra.co.nz.

"Many go fishing all their lives without knowing that it is not fish they are after."

~ Henry David Thoreau

"Grilled Trout with cream and wine sauce"

Trout Main Dish from the kitchen of: Ron Williams
Serves: 2

Ingredients
20 ml light soy sauce
1 Bok choy
Crushed fresh dill, to personal taste
1 1/2 inch ginger
1 trout
250 gm butter, softened
Olive oil30 ml cream
50 ml orange juice
75 ml late harvest riesling
1 finely chopped
1 clove garlic
1 Spinach

Instructions

Method:- 
Pick and wash spinach, removing any stems leaving only tender leaves.  
 
Wash bok choy and finely slice stems leaving the leaves whole.  
 
Prepare the sauce by combining and reducing wine, orange juice, ginger, garlic and dill until about 40 ml of liquid is left. Add soy sauce and cream and bring to the boil.  
 
Take off heat and whisk in softened butter in pieces, one at a time, only adding more when last piece has been incorporated. Season with mixed black pepper and salt.  
 
Pan fry trout in olive oil until flesh turns opaque to a translucent texture when parted slightly.  
 
Saute spinach and bok choy in a little butter and season, leaving a little crispness in bok choy stems.  
 
Arrange bok choy and spinach on plates, overlay the pan fried trout and garnish with the sauce and chopped fresh chives.



"Unless one can enjoy himself fishing with the fly, even when his efforts are unrewarded, he loses much real pleasure. More than half the intense enjoyment of fly-fishing is derived from the beautiful surroundings, the satisfaction felt from being in the open air, the new lease of life secured thereby, and the many, many pleasant recollections of all one has seen, heard and done."

~ Charles F. Orvis

"Pan Fried Rainbow Trout With Sage & Wild Mushrooms"

Trout Main Dish from the kitchen of: Brian Johnson
Serves: 4

Ingredients For Sage Mushrooms:
1 tablespoon fresh minced sage
1 cup sliced shitake mushrooms
1/2 cup sliced oyster mushrooms
3 tablespoon apple cider vinegar
3 tablespoons white wine
1 tablespoons whole butter
1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil
1 tablespoon minced garlic
pinch of sea salt or kosher salt
pinch of ground black pepper

Preparation: This dish is prepared in two steps, first the cooking of the rainbow trout. While the rainbow trout is finishing cooking you will begin to prepare in separate saute pan the wild mushroom and sage mixture that will top the fish.

Prepare The Fish: Remove the head, tail and back of the rainbow trout to leave two filets per fish. Also remove any small fins by cutting around them. Heat a large saute pan over a medium flame and add one tablespoon of vegetable oil and the two pieces of raw bacon. Cook the bacon until it becomes very crisp and remove. Once the bacon has been removed lightly dust the trout filets with seasoned flour (salt and pepper), add one tablespoon of whole butter to the saute pan and quickly add the fish filets flesh side down. Note that once you add the whole butter to the hot oil the butter will begin to burn, quickly adding the fish to the pan will reduce the heat and add a nice golden brown colour to your sauteed trout

Prepare The Mushroom Mixture: As soon as the fish starts to cook begin to saute the mushroom mixture so they will both be done cooking near the same time. Heat a medium saute pan over a medium high flame for 1 minute. Once the pan is hot add the whole butter, olive oil and minced garlic. Saute for 30 seconds, add both the shitake and oyster mushrooms and season with a pinch of salt and pepper. While your starting to cook the mushroom take note of how the rainbow trout is cooking. Once it starts to turn a nice golden brown colour flip the fish over and cook for another 90 seconds and remove. Place the fish on paper towels and reserve. Finish cooking the mushroom by adding the saute, white wine and apple cider vinegar. Cook for another minute or until the mushrooms are fully cooked and soft to the touch.

Plate The Fish: Crisscross two filets on each of the four plates. Top with the mushroom sage mixture and sprinkle with crumbled bacon. Garnish with any remaining fresh sage.

Priorities

A group of anglers went fishing and paired off in twos for the day. That night, one of the anglers returned alone, staggering under the weight of two fly boxes, waders and twelve beautiful rainbow trout.

"Where's Henry?" the others asked.

"Henry had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up the trail" the successful fisherman replied. "You left Henry lying out there and carried the fish?" they inquired. "A tough call," nodded the angler. "But I figured no one is going to steal Henry"

Twenty Differences between Fishing and Sex ("G" Rated)

 #20 No matter how much whiskey you've had, you can still Fish.

 #19 A limp rod is still useful while Fishing.

 #18 You don't have to hide your Fishing magazines.

 #17 It's perfectly okay to pay a professional to Fish with you once in a while.

 #16 The Ten Commandments don't say anything against Fishing.

 #15 - If your partner takes pictures of you Fishing, you don't have to worry about them showing up on the Internet if you become famous.

 #14 - Your Fishing partner doesn't get upset about people you Fished with long ago.

 #13 - It's perfectly respectable to Fish with a total stranger.

 #12 - When you see a really good Fishing person, you don't have to feel guilty about imagining the two of you Fishing together.

 #11 - If your regular Fishing partner isn't available, he/she won't object if you Fish with someone else.

 #10 - Nobody will ever tell you that you will go blind if you Fish by yourself.

 #9 - When dealing with a Fishing pro, you never have to wonder if they are really an undercover cop.

 #8 - You don't have to go to a sleazy shop in a seedy neighbourhood to buy Fishing stuff.

 #7 - You can have a Fishing calendar on your wall at the office, tell Fishing jokes, and invite coworkers to Fish with you without getting sued for "Fishing harassment".

 #6 - There are no Fishing-transmitted diseases.

 #5 - If you want to watch Fishing on television, you don't have to subscribe to one of those "special" channels.

 #4 - Nobody expects you to Fish with the same partner for the rest of your life.

 #3 - Nobody expects you to give up Fishing if your partner loses interest in it.

 #2 - You don't have to be a newlywed to plan a vacation primarily to enjoy your favourite activity...Fishing!

 #1 - Your Fishing partner will never say, "Not again? We just Fished last week! Is Fishing all you ever think about?!"

Do you have a great "Fishy Story" or special recipe? E-mail it to us!